Judged

I am frustrated by people who feel that they have a superior position to me and can judge my actions. I fully admit that I have made mistakes, that I have fallen more than I have walked, that I flat out screw up more than I would like to admit. But I am my own worst critic. I do not need others to point out my flaws as I can promise I am fully aware of each and every single one of them, and have ached over it for longer than imaginable. I am at heart a perfectionist, and I detest the imperfections and failures in my life. I am horridly embarrassed by some of the behaviors that I engaged in during the cycles of my bipolar disorder. Could I control it? No. Could I understand the ramifications of my actions? Not really. Do I need to be reminded of these over and over? No. I am healing, I am in the process of getting my feet under me and becoming the person I want to be. I am making changes in my life based on what is best for me. I need people who believe in me, who can understand that someone so intelligent can do something so stupid because of a scrambled brain, who are willing to look past ALL of the medical issues and see me. I am not my mistakes.