I realize that I have been going out into the world automatically expecting people to know how to interact with someone who uses a wheelchair, and yet thinking back on my own educational experiences I recognized that these skills are never really taught to us in our society. I have the advantage of having worked with amazing children with special needs, and having been a vocal advocate for all individuals with disabilities, so even before I ended up with my butt sitting in the wheelchair I was fairly conscious of at least some of the basic issues. Being the one sitting in that seat has been quite an education for me, however, and I would like to share my wisdom. I should warn you that some of it may be shared with my usual sarcasm and dark humor, because this is me and sometimes the truth hurts, but it hurts less with a good laugh.

Ms. Emily Hell On Wheels Guide to Interacting With People on Wheels'

1. My IQ did not become cut in half the moment I sat down in my wheelchair. Please do not speak to me as if I am completely unable to follow a basic conversation. And for the sake of everything sacred and holy enough with the baby talk - that high pitched voice and overly false excited tone that even toddlers hate is just rude. In other terms, "Excuse me, but does this wheelchair make my brain look small?"

2. I'm in a wheelchair, not hearing impaired. There is no need to yell when you talk to me, unless it somehow makes you feel better to look really ridiculous.

3. I'm down here. Talk to me, not to whomever I happen to be with. It is unquestionably rude to ask the person I am with questions about me when I am sitting right there as if I can not hear you because I am a foot or two below your eye level. Remember, I am at the perfect height to ram into your legs "accidentally".

4. Think before you open your mouth. A brief list of comments I am so tired of hearing is as follows:
* Oh, did somebody forget you? (Yes, just like you forget a purse someone forgot a 28 year old in a wheelchair on the sidewalk. Ugh! I hear this one when I am waiting for the bus "without adult supervision")
*Who is here with you? (Gasp! I can go places all by myself without adult supervision - they do let us out once in a while!)
* You sure drive that well. (Why thanks, you sure manage walking with those legs well too!)
* Oh you poor thing... (Save the pity unless you are making a cash donation)
*Why do your feet point the wrong way?/Why are you so knock kneed and pigeon toed? (I don't mind questions about my disability, but tact people! I usually answer that I am studying ballet.)

5. Ask before pushing my wheelchair, even if it looks like I am having a hard time. Having someone suddenly start pushing your chair is very much like having someone suddenly pick you up and start carrying you somewhere. I don't like being pushed around.

6. Please ask questions, and ask instead of staring. Allow kids to ask questions. Education is always better than fear or ignorance or stereotypes. I promise I don't bite...much. :)

7. If you see me struggling with a door that is not wheelchair accessible, would it kill you to open the door? Karma people, Karma!

8. Remember that while I may use a wheelchair, I am still a 28 year old woman with dreams and wishes, thoughts and opinions, wisdom and insight, worth and value, and desires and hopes. I just happen to access the world by using wheels. Most of all, remember that in a heartbeat you could be me and how would you want to be treated.