Yesterday I experienced one of my more severe, most dreaded Dysautonomic crashes (also known as crises but I prefer the term crash as it is very much like suddenly slamming into a brick wall doing 60 mph and crumpling to the ground). I had simply gone to the pharmacy to pick up three much needed medications and this act resulted in my body being unable to process the input it was receiving and I went from functioning to slamming into that brick wall in about 10 seconds flat. The typical crash goes like this - my blood pressure peers over the edge, contemplates the alternatives, and then plummets. It is secretively a sadomasichistic entity that loves to torture itself and the body in which it dwells by climbing peaks and throwing itself off of them, never knowing where it will land. I develop a headache that makes my migraines look appealing and that is impervious to pain medicine. Laying absolutely flat - no pillows, no incline at all- in a pitch dark room and not moving a muscle can take a little of the edge off of the headache. I am dizzy and if I try to move into an upright position frequently tap dance very close to passing out. Nausea follows the headache, and last night I ended up vomiting. Impressively, I vomited in the dark into a trash bag lined garbage can and did not miss a drop - nothing on the bed, nothing on me. I am a professional. My heart rate does weird things during these crashes and it frequently alternates between skipping beats and throwing extra ones in for the fun of it. This started at about 4pm yesterday and the fun did not end until sometime around 6am. I finally fell asleep around 3:30am after being able to slip some meds into my stomach and convincing it to keep them down, but at that point I still had the massive headache.
Today I am in the "hangover" phase in which it feels very much like I have done 10 rounds in a boxing ring, then gotten run over by a semi truck as I crawled home. I slept basically all day today as my body tried to reset itself, and I have been having to try to push fluids to make up all the ones I lost out on. If I am going to feel this hungover, I at least want the night of drinking before hand and the embarrassing stories to go along with it. Preferrably with pictures and or video. I have never even been near drunk, but I know what a hangover must feel like, including the little man who pranced in a field of manure and then danced a jig in my mouth while I slept last night. Evil little creature!  The frustrating thing is that, while I can avoid known triggers of these crashes, they still happen out of nowhere and slam me hard and fast and viciously. All that seeking ER treatment would do would establish IV fluids, there is no other treatment plan for these crashes as any medication administered has a risk of triggering another extreme reaction. I do have access to zofran, pain medication, and reglan at home but they only do so much. This is a part of living with Dysautonomia that few people see, that few people understand, and that does not neatly fit on a checklist of daily living skills for assessment.